Let’s Talk About Emotional Regulation
- Silvia Violante
- Oct 3
- 2 min read
Emotional regulation isn’t about trying to stop yourself from feeling something. It’s about learning how to experience emotions without becoming overwhelmed. This is an important skill that can improve wellbeing, relationships, and everyday coping.
At its core, emotional regulation is about awareness. It starts with a pause and asking yourself: “What am I feeling right now?” This small step helps create space between what you feel and how you choose to respond.
Once we have awareness, a key aspect is about providing a safe space to that feeling, rather than trying to control it. As such, validating your emotions is also key. As Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) reminds us, there is nothing wrong with feeling what you feel. Emotions aren’t problems to be fixed; they are signals to be acknowledged. What matters most is how you relate to these emotions in your daily life.
Some ways we can enhance awareness and build emotional language around our experiences are:
Listen to what you are feeling
Name what you are feeling
Validate how you are feeling without judgement.
From there comes choice. Not every impulse requires immediate action. Sometimes, the best response is as simple as taking a slow breath as a way to ground yourself. This creates flexibility which allows you to respond in ways that align with your values rather than react on autopilot.
Like any skill, emotional regulation is learnt and strengthened through practice and self-compassion. Think of it like exercising a muscle: the more you use the right techniques, the more effective and natural it becomes.
If you are finding it difficult to manage emotions, seeking professional support can make a difference. As a Kensington Psychologist, I work with clients to build practical skills for self-regulation, emotional awareness, and resilience. Therapy provides a safe and supportive space to explore your emotions, develop strategies, and learn how to respond in a way that is more aligned with your values.
Remember: feeling emotions is not the problem. Ignoring them, or ignoring your own needs often is. By tuning in, validating your experience, and practicing new responses, we can learn to respond with more clarity and alignment.
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