Rethinking Self-Care: Moving Beyond the Buzzword for Lasting Well being

It is important we start redefining self-care

Self-care is a term we hear frequently, often used to emphasise the importance of proactively adopting behaviors that promote holistic well being, especially during times of illness, overwhelm, or stress.

But self-care is far more than just indulgence or occasional pampering. It’s about addressing your physical health, mental health, relationships, and sense of self through meaningful tools and actions that allow you to live your life fully. If you’ve ever been to therapy or work in mental health, whether as a practitioner or in clinical supervision, you’ve likely heard this discussed often.

The Problem with “Prescribing” Self-Care

Have you ever found yourself thinking, “I only live for the weekends”? Or perhaps you’re just holding on to an upcoming holiday to escape work stress or personal worries, only to return and find yourself back at square one?

Despite doing what we consider “good” self-care, why do we sometimes feel no better? The truth is, while self-care activities can offer immediate relief, they often act like a band-aid rather than a long-term solution. This is because simply “prescribing” self-care doesn’t address deeper underlying issues such as negative thinking patterns, interpersonal challenges, or low coping skills.

Moreover, self-care as it’s often framed places full responsibility on the individual to “fix” problems that are largely structural, like a stressful workplace, poor-quality relationships, or broader social inequities.

In my work as a Kensington Psychologist and Psychology Supervisor, I frequently hear clients and supervisees express feeling like they “aren’t doing enough” to prioritise self-care, or “don’t have time” to engage in it. Ironically, this pressure to practice self-care can add to their cognitive load, making them feel even more overwhelmed. It’s worth reflecting on how something intended to be healing can sometimes feel like another task on an already packed to-do list.

Shifting from Behavior to a Systemic and Holistic Approach

True self-care invites us to take a deep, compassionate look at ourselves within the broader context of our lives. It’s not about “having to do” certain activities or ticking boxes to feel productive.

Instead, it’s about integrating small, sustainable acts into your daily routine that provide nourishment or a moment to wind down from life’s juggle. It’s about attuning to your personal needs and showing up for yourself consistently. After all, we need to put on our own oxygen mask before we can help others.

While rest and recharge are vital, I want to challenge the myth that self-care always looks peaceful or passive. Self-care can also be active and involve addressing systemic and environmental factors that impact your well being to help you feel truly revitalized.

Meaningful Self-Care Looks Like Reflection and Boundaries

Engaging in meaningful self-care might involve asking yourself questions like:

• What would my future self thank me for?

• How do I feel about the factors holding me back in terms of wellbeing? Do I want to take steps to change them?

• What are my boundaries?

• What do I need to say no to?

  
  

At The Sustainable Space, we are committed to long-term well being solutions that honor the value of integrating these practices into everyday life. As a Kensington Psychologist, I believe self-care is grounded in meaningful actions that align with your values. This approach supports lasting behavioral change and honours your integrated well being over time.